Jars of Clay

“For God who said, ‘Let light shine out of the darkness,’ made his light shine in our hearts to give us the light of the knowledge of God’s glory displayed in the face of Christ.  But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all surpassing power is from God and not from us.  We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed.  We always carry around in our body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be revealed in our body.  For we who are alive are always being given over to death for Jesus’ sake, so that his life may also be revealed in our mortal body.  So then, death is at work in us, but life is at work in you.  It is written, “I believed; therefore I have spoken.”  All of this is for your benefit, so that the grace that is reaching more and more people may cause Thanksgiving to over flow to the glory of our creator.  Therefore, we do not lose heart.  Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day.  For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all.  So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.”  2 Corinthians 4

My mom asked me a few days before Thanksgiving if I would do the blessing for our family this year.  I agreed to this feeling I would more than likely wing it two wine glasses in before dinner.  What can I say, my family has always enjoyed participating in cocktail hour before big meals and during the holidays with big family gatherings this is something I enjoy as well.

This Thanksgiving  morning,  I woke up while it was still dark and remembered I was in charge of this event before dinner and started thinking about what I should say.  I came across some scripture in Corinthians that seemed to grasp me that morning. I decided I would read these verses to my family and friends before praying with them. Things didn’t go as smoothly as I planned.  The moment I began to read the words to them, I was overwhelmed with emotion and longing I haven’t felt in a while that turned to tears.  I forced myself through each word, yet I am not really sure if I did any good or helped impact anyone, because my pain got the best of me in that moment.  And yes this was all sober:)

Lying here now I’ve been thinking about why I chose this particular scripture, why I felt it was important to hear as family and friends gathered for a meal.  The book of Corinthians consisted of letters written by the apostle Paul to the church of Corinth.  Basically, it was a hot mess there.  The people had turned against each other, they weren’t functioning as a community anymore and it was pretty much every man for himself.  Complete chaos.   In a much more beautiful way than I’m describing it,  Paul’s letters to the church explain how powerful God’s love is and how important it is that they love one another and love God.  How incredible joy comes from this kind of love.  He encourages them to let go of all the hate, self-destruction, greed, jealousy, lust, dishonesty, and come back to these two basic desires from God.  Love him and love each other.

I thought about all the people yesterday that didn’t get a meal, that didn’t have family to spend this holiday with.  I thought about how I had more than plenty.  I thought about why that is.  While I have no answer for each person’s chapter, I do believe we are all working towards going home one day.  I believe there is a pull in each of us that makes us question what is beyond this world because it never quite feels like enough.  At least for me, it has always felt like there is something more, something bigger.  I thought about John’s purpose as I read these words and what purpose he serves now at a bigger scale.  What purpose all those that have gone before us now serve.

I said before that my every day problems are nothing compared to the reality of what is going on around this world.  I had a good Thanksgiving.  I even get to go see most of John’s family today and spend time with them.  I have so much support and love coming from so many.

I think I chose these words for this blessing because I wanted to acknowledge that we so easily find ourselves in situations like the people of Corinth.  We judge, we become jealous, angry, defeated, dishonest, we sometimes say things that are hurtful.  We don’t always consider everyone’s situation, why they are the way they are, where they’ve come from.  We let family dynamics get the best of us and turn away from our families when some people have no family at all.  We let things fester, we hold grudges, we become stubborn.  My prayer for my family, really for everyone is that we acknowledge that yes these feeling do surface, but through acknowledgement they don’t have to own us or over take us.  Our worst day may be someone’s best day.

 My prayer is that no matter what chapter each person find’s themselves in and no matter how awful it is, that they can hold tight to Paul’s words, “this is temporary compared to what is to come and worth it.”  When I really put that into perspective, how short this life can be, I realize that all those feelings that fester truly are not from God, they are from me, and they simply don’t matter.

I believe we all have a bigger purpose we are working towards.  We’re all heading home one day.   We have the free will to chose how we get there and what path we take.  My hope is that as we move into a new year, yet another chapter, that we look at how we can let our light shine through the darkness of this world, regardless of our pain.  How chosing even a small act of kindness makes such a difference. My hope is that we each can tap into the treasure he gives us in jars of clay, that we ask what our purpose is, that we again continue to chose love over our pain and let that flow to others that need it.

My Thanksgiving focused on what is unseen, what is eternal.   I am beyond grateful for my hope in that, for my hope in going home.  For that chapter far outweighs any pain I find myself in now.  My prayer is that others can feel that too no matter what.