"My Tribute to John", this was read by me at the Celebration of Life ceremonies in Mt. Airy, NC and Grants Pass, OR.
My husband, or as many of you may know, my
“muffin” was the most adventurous, athletic, humble, intelligent, genuine,
handsome, hilarious man I have ever met.
We met thanks to a mutual friend in Richmond, Virginia back in April of
2008. I’ll never forget having coffee
with this friend who started to tell me about John, trying to talk me into
meeting him. He told me that John was
extremely handsome with dark features, he was a forester, he drove a Prius, and
he lived on a river. This friend told me
that he had no doubt that John was my soul mate (even though we had not met
yet) and this was simply the man I was supposed to marry. I remember thinking he was crazy! This friend said, “Trust me Erin, you just
have to meet John.” I’ll never forget
this friend telling me, that while he wasn’t sure what John’s beliefs were, he
could instantly tell that John was a spiritual person with an old soul and
displayed the behaviors and characteristics of a great man. Shortly after this coffee date, I agreed to
trust our good friend’s instincts and meet this man named John Wilburn. I will forever be grateful to our good friend
that I did. We had an instant connection
and sure enough, found ourselves kayaking down the James River the very next
day.
John was one of the few people I’ve met that
are completely comfortable with who they are and what they believe in. He never conformed to the world of
technology. When I first met John, he
lived in a cinderblock cabin by a river in the middle of nowhere. He owned a guitar, a table, a single bed, a
wood burning stove and an IPOD. I had to
actually convince him to get a cell phone so I could call him! You
can tell a lot about a person by who their friends are. I believe this ceremony today is a true
testament to who John was and the people he surrounded himself with. There were no “surface” friends in John’s
life. Every friend was a true investment
for John and someone he had an important connection with.
I had the opportunity to experience with John
what I believe were his happiest moments in Southern Oregon. Where we live is a true gem and a place where
a new river, mountain bike trail or hike presents its unique features every
weekend. The kayaking and forestry
community in Oregon instantly loved John and we were so blessed to develop a
great group of friends so quickly.
God blessed me with the precious opportunity
to be with John after he passed away. I
held his strong hands, stroked his beautiful hair, and kissed him for the last
time. In those final moments, there was
a feeling of complete warmth and peace that washed over me. I began to smile and laugh over the joy I felt
for him. I looked at my beautiful
husband and knew with absolute certainty, that he is OK. It was clear to me in that moment, that John
is in a much better place, with no pain, no worry, but complete joy, happiness
and peace. I know his adventure is
continuing in paradise. I believe that
when my time comes to leave this earth, John will be waiting for me, and I have
nothing but praise and thanks to God for receiving John in those last moments
and taking him home.
I have continued to feel John’s presence with
me throughout these past two weeks and know that his spirit will always be with
me. If he could speak directly to all of
you now, I believe he would tell you to live a life of adventure and
explore. Don’t spend your time chasing
the dollar bill, staring at a TV, and getting caught up in what other people
think of you or what your status should say every 5 minutes. Go outside, play music, drink good beer,
never waste food, read hard cover books, and always look for the witty humor in
things. Don’t be afraid of a challenging
recipe, with patience can come one delicious meal. Learn to be comfortable in moments of silence
with each other. If you can create or
build it before buying it, do just that.
Never pay for camping, it’s the woods for goodness sake. Always take your dog with you on adventures,
or to the grocery store, or to work, a man’s dog should go with him everywhere.
Thank you so much for being here today and
showing me how John impacted your life.
To know the influence my husband had on so many people is truly
inspiring. That man built a confidence,
strength and sense of humor in me that I will continue to share with all of you
as we move forward.
I’ll close with a verse from the last song my
husband was listening to just before leaving this world. This is a verse from the song “Close to the
Edge,” by YES.
“Crossed the line around the changes of the
summer,
Reaching out to call the color of the sky.
Passed around a moment clothed in mornings faster than we see.
Getting over all the time I had to worry,
Leaving all the changes far from far behind.
We relieve the tension only to find out the master's name.”
Reaching out to call the color of the sky.
Passed around a moment clothed in mornings faster than we see.
Getting over all the time I had to worry,
Leaving all the changes far from far behind.
We relieve the tension only to find out the master's name.”
Oh, my... Just beautiful, Erin.
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